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You’ll Never Score a Beauty in a Ski Town | Bomb Snow

You got too blazed or drunk skiridf hang out and you had to go home. Your truck smells like beef jerky, is covered with Cheeto dust and has cans of Oly full of dip spit.

You then have the cyill to ask for roadhead. You wear Croakies, fly fishing shirts or Chacos to weddings and other fancy occasions. Keep it on the shemale wonder please, bro.

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You like pow better than titties? She can rage more than you.

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You wear the same hat everyday from Oct-June. Even worse; your ex-girlfriend knitted it.

You couch crash C: Sexs gangbang roomate is her ex-boyfriend. Her toys are better than yours. You only respond to her via text. Worse, she calls and skoride still respond via text.

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The only wamna you have actually taken her on is to a potluck at your buddies house; she made a dish and you brought tortilla chips. You always have the lamest Halloween and party costumes.

Females dig on creativity. You take other chicks on dates to her place of work. Words By: Emil Orth.

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Your dog gets beat up by hers and you get pissed whenever this happens. Your closet consists of two colors: Your favorite restaurant is the popcorn machine at the local brewery.

Your roommate cuts your hair or you cut your own and brag about it. Neon and camo are cool for most occasions gents but not all of.

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You like Bluegrass You eat Hot Pockets You have more than 10 stickers on your vehicle. Winter camping, eh?

Wait, all winter? You have a trust fund and you still got Duck Tape all over your shit. You refer to her as dude, man, or bro.

You break up chiill her every winter. You buy her gear for Christmas because you could use a new headlamp. She can hike faster than you.

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Madison Wilde is the sweetest, sexiest lady you will ever meet in every ski town. Take a hint from this charming betty and get your tracks in line.

Treat her with respect, open the car door, cook her something that requires a stove and she might just give you a chance. Buena Suerte young Jedis. Want a hot woman? Lay off the Hot Pockets.

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Words BY: Madison Wilde. More From Bomb Snow. Fernie 4 Film Fest. Ruminations of an Old Skier.

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